Wednesday, July 28
Rory's gone home now. My house is tidier but I can no longer get hugs on demand. I'm probably going to Belfast for two weeks next month, but that's not now. He's installed my new hard drive and Linux finally. I can't find anything, can't make the mp3 player work and everything seems very strange. I know I'll get used to it in time but again, that's not now. I didn't manage to back up my address book, ICQ contacts, bookmarks or email. I did back up my Soulseek file information, only to find that there's no way of adding it to the Linux program. I'm now using Firefox and it's nice to have autocomplete back. We still haven't got my digital camera drivers working though.
Rory and I ended up not attending the gig we were meant to go to on Saturday. He had a headache and felt bad, but it went soon after, though it was too late to go by then. We stayed in and played on the computer instead.
Monday was fairly dull as I was at a SHIP meeting all day. In the evening, Ed, Rory and I watched some "videos" and had some "fun" which was, um, interesting. He went home on Tuesday lunchtime and I went to get my eyebrows dyed and shaped and my eyelashes dyed at Harvey Nichols. We ended up not dying the eyebrows as the beautician said it would look strange due to my eyebrows being very sparse. The eyelashes aren't obviously dyed, but I can tell the difference and it has helped. We also went to Cyberdog where I spent the voucher I won last month (and some extra) on a red 60's-ish space/futuristic dress thing. Apparently it looks really good on me. Then on top of all that, I went and got my cheek pierced. It didn't hurt too much, it isn't immensely sore, but it is very swollen and I'm meant to use a saltwater mouthwash after every drink, piece of food or cigarette. I can't clean my teeth or yawn / laugh / smile properly. I hope it will all be worth it when it heals though, which should be in about two weeks.
And finally... have a look at a B3tan's take off of the government's Preparing for Emergencies site, and look soon as it may not be there for much longer. 19:06
Rory and I ended up not attending the gig we were meant to go to on Saturday. He had a headache and felt bad, but it went soon after, though it was too late to go by then. We stayed in and played on the computer instead.
Monday was fairly dull as I was at a SHIP meeting all day. In the evening, Ed, Rory and I watched some "videos" and had some "fun" which was, um, interesting. He went home on Tuesday lunchtime and I went to get my eyebrows dyed and shaped and my eyelashes dyed at Harvey Nichols. We ended up not dying the eyebrows as the beautician said it would look strange due to my eyebrows being very sparse. The eyelashes aren't obviously dyed, but I can tell the difference and it has helped. We also went to Cyberdog where I spent the voucher I won last month (and some extra) on a red 60's-ish space/futuristic dress thing. Apparently it looks really good on me. Then on top of all that, I went and got my cheek pierced. It didn't hurt too much, it isn't immensely sore, but it is very swollen and I'm meant to use a saltwater mouthwash after every drink, piece of food or cigarette. I can't clean my teeth or yawn / laugh / smile properly. I hope it will all be worth it when it heals though, which should be in about two weeks.
And finally... have a look at a B3tan's take off of the government's Preparing for Emergencies site, and look soon as it may not be there for much longer. 19:06
Tuesday, July 27
I've been busy whilst I've not been posting. Ed came over on Sunday, late as he hadn't got to sleep until after dawn due to a huge B3ta party. We let him sleep for a while then roused him to come out for a meal with Phil, Tom, Rory and I. We were meant to go to Hansa's but Rory had the foresight to check that they actually opened on Sunday evenings, which they don't, and we rearranged to go to Grove Cafe, the place which offers the delicious vegan pizzas, instead. Ed had pizza, everyone else order curry. I had a vegetable palaak, which apparantly includes ginger, garlic and other herbs and spices. It was wonderful. Afterwards we went to the Royal Park for beer, conversation and looking at pretty people. The music was a little loud but then it is a student pub. It was more than compensated for by the amount of attractive people also there.
There is more to say, but Rory's demanding I come to bed, so I'll have to post it tomorrow. 22:32
There is more to say, but Rory's demanding I come to bed, so I'll have to post it tomorrow. 22:32
Friday, July 23
Rory and I intended to go to Ilkley today. We made it as far as the bus stop into town then changed our minds. We haven't done much of note and the strain on Rory is showing. I'm not used to entertaining two people, I can barely manage one. Gig tomorrow and curry on Sunday. At least I'm getting hugs.
23:10
Thursday, July 22
I've been forgetting to blog again. But nothing spectacular has happened. I saw my psychiatrist and psychologist with nothing special to report. Rory's here now and we spent the day shopping. He bought lots, I bought a sandwich. We've arranged to go for a curry with Phil and Tom on Sunday. The day keeps changing, I never realised it was so difficult to eat curry. Ed's coming on Sunday to collect the socks he left here last time and to buy more halva. We're meant to be going to see the Seven Inches on Saturday, with lots of other bands. I'm expecting it to be noisy and crowded, so we'll see how things go.
19:42
Friday, July 16
Today was the last day of the class. I finally don't have to get up at 8am any more - yey! I had trouble with my final self portrait. None of my features would work properly and I ended up making myself look like a monkey. I compared it to Monday's picture, and the difference was huge, though not as big as it had been after the last course. I had reverted back to my old ways of drawing I'm sad to say. After the class I was feeling sad, nothing to do any more, and my brain has cultivated a small obsession with Andy (the tutor) these past few days. It'll latch on to anyone who shows me a bit of attention, it's terrible. I should see him at Unity Day though, and hopefully by then I won't be pining after him anymore. I know I'm desperate, but I think a one-armed, moustached parent who's twice my age is taking the piss a bit. We'll see. In other news, Rory's coming over on Wednesday and Ed on Sunday after he's been to a party in Manchester. Hurray for three-way hugging!
20:37
Thursday, July 15
Wednesday, July 14
Last night I started reading The Intimate Memoirs of an Edwardian Dandy. It was a present from a friend (no, really it was) for recommending some books to her. Admittedly it was on my wishlist. It's set in 1899 and as its title suggests, it is somewhat, ahem, explicit, with regular references to "cunney lips" and scenes involving a sixteen year old having sex with a woman whilst his uncle, somewhat older, also has her. These Victorians certainly weren't as inhibited as they're made out to be.
18:49
Tuesday, July 13
Last night I read Lisa, Bright and Dark. Before I opened the book I couldn't have told you what happened, and as I was reading I didn't know how it would unfold either. But I couldn't shake the feeling that I'd read it before. Maybe I borrowed it from the library a year or two back.
Still not feeling very convinced I'll finish this drawing course. I decided to go along this morning then see how I feel at lunchtime. 09:12
Still not feeling very convinced I'll finish this drawing course. I decided to go along this morning then see how I feel at lunchtime. 09:12
Monday, July 12
Another weekend survived. I never thought I would appreciate Mondays as much as I do right now. However all my Monday entertainment is disappearing now until September, so that may well change. Today was the start of the drawing class. It seems that this isn't the second half of the class from last term, but is in fact the class I did repeated. I thought it would be as such, but someone from the class assured me otherwise, except now it seems she was wrong. I doubt I'll make it to the end of the week, I'll probably be far too bored. I found that although I've done no drawing since the class in February, my newly found skills hadn't completely disappeared and this morning's self portrait was reasonably successful. After the class I went through to collect my work from the arts course: the silkscreening, tie-dye and batik I hadn't yet taken home. It doesn't feel like the end of the term, and it especially doesn't feel like the end of the year. It seems strange that I won't be going back there in September, but I'm sure I'll return at some point.
21:51
Friday, July 9
Did I ever mention that I hate weekends? I must say this every week. The loneliness is getting to me. So much time to fill. How did I manage before? I guess that being forced to be in the company of others, people I despised, for 40 hours a week, every week (except school holidays) meant that I treasured the time I had to myself. Time I could read or write or be depressed in. Now there's too much of it, and too little to punctuate it with. I wish for someone to spend time with, but I would probably tire of that soon. I don't have many things to do around here, it's awkward when people stay, trying to find activities. But if there was someone regular, we could go to the cinema, or drink and smoke and talk, or play chess or scrabble, or just hug. I hate this loneliness.
I didn't go to yoga tonight, and I think it was the last session. I started reading Oryx and Crake finally, taking a break from The Passion of New Eve. 21:57
I didn't go to yoga tonight, and I think it was the last session. I started reading Oryx and Crake finally, taking a break from The Passion of New Eve. 21:57
Still not being doing much. It's been raining and I haven't had any inspiration, though I have started work on a large collage in a stairwell at SHIP. No one else seems to be very enthusiastic about it, but the wall wasn't doing anything better, so screw them. One thing I do have to bring your attention to is this. Apparantly it took about three weeks and three whole Biros to make. And boy is it worth it.
10:00
Wednesday, July 7
Our regular Wednesday evening pub visit was shifted forward a day on the spur of the moment and thus I found myself going for drinks last night. Of course there was no pub quiz to keep us occupied, but we managed to come up with enough conversation to fill the time. We discussed films, B3tans and no doubt many other things I can't remember right now. It was a fun evening. The people at the table next to us were a mixed age bunch, from late twenties to late fifties I would have guessed, most of whom were wearing pentacle jewellry, and who were looking at a couple of tarot decks. I didn't speak to them though. No pub tonight, but they have agreed to come see the exhibition at Swarthmore in a couple of weeks of the work the stained glass classes have done. Dad said he'd come too, but I think I'll arrange that one for a different time.
10:18
Sunday, July 4
Not been up to much. A bit of reading, some music listening, little else. The foreseeable future isn't much more interesting either. Last week at my Swarthmore course tomorrow, as the week after (the true final session) I won't be there as I'll be doing my intensive learn to draw class again. It does mean I have to finish soldering my window, then grout it and finish it all off in one session, and I also have to do all my screen printing in one session. I doubt I will be very successful. After this, Rory's meant to be coming to stay for a week at some point in the month, I should be spending two weeks or so over there in August, along with a long weekend in Sheffield. And that's all I have planned until September. If only I'd actually make use of this spare time instead of just sitting around playing crap computer games and trying to find someone to entertain me.
Actually, now I think of it, there is something else worth reporting. My mother asked me if I'm a prostitute. She's had a habit of dropping round recently when I've had friends staying, who've always been young men who she thinks I've advertised for on the internet (she misunderstands my methods of getting huggees). It amused me. With regards to the relevant men, I think they all want to shag me, but I don't want to reciprocate. I'm going through a wanting-a-woman phase. Pity I've no feasible ideas of how to get hold of any. Volunteers more than welcome. 20:24
Actually, now I think of it, there is something else worth reporting. My mother asked me if I'm a prostitute. She's had a habit of dropping round recently when I've had friends staying, who've always been young men who she thinks I've advertised for on the internet (she misunderstands my methods of getting huggees). It amused me. With regards to the relevant men, I think they all want to shag me, but I don't want to reciprocate. I'm going through a wanting-a-woman phase. Pity I've no feasible ideas of how to get hold of any. Volunteers more than welcome. 20:24
