I've been feeling drained today. Sometimes it's been sunny but it's always been windy. Feeling a bit better this evening but I don't think it will last for long. There was some fleas in the bathroom this morning which upset me. Then I saw one on me in my bedroom. I hope it traveled on me from the bathroom as I don't have the energy to cope with them in my bedroom. Bedroom requires action, where as if they're just in the bathroom I can pick them up as I see them and dispose of them in one way or another.
There was a new member to the LGB group today. She's 22, has interesting hair, lives near Harrogate (quite far away), is vegan and seems pretty cool. I want to adopt her and make her my friend. I don't know how feasible that is, but we'll see how things go. I got my hair dyed again yesterday. It's not as red as I hoped for, but still looks nice. And it's much better than the blonde which was showing through. Perhaps it'll get dreaded in a month or so.
I was talking to someone from B3ta about how it's strange when you see or read or use a word repeatedly in a short space of time and it begins to lose its meaning, and how this make me realise that most words are just arbitrary labels. He said this:
"earlier today, me and friend were sat outside the british museum, and i was looking at the atoz to work out where to go next, and remarked that the u2 song "where the streets have no name" couldn't ever happen: if the streets had no names, people would just call them things like "the long one over there" which would then become their names. thus, they would always have names. another reason why u2 are crap."
I just wanted to share that.
22:06
Oh Jesus, why do I always let these things build and build until it takes so long to finish something I end up resenting it and then avoiding it again later? I'm a silly bunny I guess is the answer. So here's a brief summary of the past fortnight of non-bloggage. At least as much as I can remember.
Have been flirting with more B3tans, who have promised to come and see me and do naughty things to my naked, quivering body. A B3ta bash has been organised for next Saturday, and another for August when I have an American B3tan staying with me. My interview at the art college went really, really well and I'm almost certainly going to be offered an unconditional place. There's talk of me taking a low qualification in Sculpture too, which sounds interesting. I saw a BNP sticker in Bramley Park the other day which upset, and made me want to move even more. David's playing a gig tonight with
his band but I'm not going along. GoJonnyGoGoGoGo was going really well but I got depressed and fat and we had to leave after a band and a half. We gave the Sunday tickets to David and bought Scrabble instead, and I've been playing several games of it with anyone who would play too. Did I mention this before?
Went for a meal with my parents and brother, who was up from Oxford for the weekend, to a very nice restaurant in Brighouse called
Brooks. The table cloths are made of paper and each table is provided with some crayons to draw upon them with. I had great fun doing this, but was distraught when, at the end of the meal, the staff threw out the table cloth with no regard for the masterpiece I had created there upon. The food was good though, and I enjoyed myself. The evening was marred only by the intense heat in the dining room. Originally we were placed by an open window with a lovely cool breeze. Mum objected however and we were moved to the centre of the room, where we proceeded to sweat the evening away. Mum even took her cardigan off. The day after we took dad to Manchester airport as he was flying to Crete for a holiday. The remaining three of us went shopping in the
Trafford Centre. I bought a lovely long purple hippy skirt which is, amazingly, the right length for me and doesn't need to be altered. It occurred to me as we drove home that I had survived the thronging, rude, ignorant, fat, sweaty, heaving, obstructive masses and hadn't had a panic attack. I hadn't even been slightly anxious. I was pissed off, tired, hot and annoyed, but not panicky. I took it as a sign that I'm steadily getting better and more able to cope with everyday life.
15:54